Written by: Magdalena Styś
header credits: @EwDatsGROSS and @ULTRAGLOSS on Twitter
Looking at 2020 from today’s perspective, with all its crazy events and twists, feels like a fever dream. The troublesome 12 months changed our society in many ways - and that includes our memes. My lockdown experience can be defined by whatever social media trends were thriving at the moment, whether it was “Go Piss Girl”, “Nature is Healing, We Are the Virus” or “Do Whatever You Need to Cope”, the star of this article.
The “Do Whatever You Need to Cope” meme took over social media (especially Twitter) in the first half of 2020. It combined self-care content, which has recently risen in popularity, with well known and loved movie tropes. People were describing the actions of characters from popular movies, like “Mamma Mia!”, “Titanic” (shown above) or “Gone Girl”, and ended their posts with the phrase “do whatever you need to cope”. In the very uncertain times that were the first six months of 2020, incorporating self-care and phrases related to mental health into our memes was more than appropriate. This meme format not only provided us with entertainment, but also reminded us about the importance of coping mechanisms. As you’ve probably figured out by now, though, Twitter isn’t the place to get mental health advice, so none of the coping mechanisms presented in the tweets are actually helpful. That’s where I, your friendly neighborhood researcher, come in to tell you about actually healthy ways to cope with unpleasant situations.
There are two kinds of coping skills you can develop: problem-focused coping skills or emotion-focused coping skills. Problem-focused coping skills are all about addressing the root of the issue and changing the situation that’s making you uncomfortable; emotion-focused coping skills are helpful when you cannot do anything about the circumstances you’re in, because their goal is to help you relax and unwind. For example: if you got a bad grade on a test, a problem-focused way of coping would be messaging the teacher about how you can improve or getting extra credit to make up for the bad score. An emotion-focused coping mechanism would be watching a feel-good movie or hanging out with your friends to calm your nerves. It’s important to remember that both kinds of coping skills will help you deal with day-to-day life; one isn’t better than the other (even though they might fit different circumstances better).
Now, only one question remains: should you really do WHATEVER you need to cope?
No! Of course not! Don’t listen to Twitter!
There are many coping mechanisms which might make you feel better in the short run, but can cause damage and be unhealthy for you in the long run. Those unhealthy coping skills include overspending, abusing drugs, sleeping too much, or regular venting about your problems to others. When developing coping skills, you need to be mindful of how they’ll affect you not only in the moment, but also in the future.
Go out with friends, read a book you’ve been meaning to read since January, make a blanket fort and climb some trees. Or, if you’d like to fix whatever’s making you feel bad: make to-do lists, ask people for help, address the problems you’re facing. As long as it’s healthy and it brings you joy, follow the path of fictional characters and do whatever you need to cope.
SOURCES
Morin, Amy. "Healthy Coping Skills For Uncomfortable Emotions". Verywell Mind, 2020, https://www.verywellmind.com/forty-healthy-coping-skills-4586742. Accessed 18 July 2021.
This was hilarious! I love all the pop-culture references, and it is such an important message😍
This was so entertaining throughout and fun to read!! Loved it 💖